Well, poop. The Great Red Bull Fiasco of 2005 ended (peacefully) before it fully developed into a reality TV ragefest. Ugh! I hate you reality TV gods. I shake my fists at you in frustrated anger. After last week's pre-Thanksgiving Red Bull/Granola bar bitch fest, I was super-psyched for some more petty fighting amongst the girls. But things ended just when they were getting started.The girls got split into pairs to go sight-seeing around London (an obvious ploy by the producers to get more fight footage between Bre and Nicole). In order to avoid hearing any more petty gossip (and possibly due to off-camera nudging by producers) Jayla and Nik decided that they wanted to go sight-seeing together. The stage was set for a showdown between Bre and Nicole, but then the girls decided to play nice. Sigh. They sat down at a cafe and shared some red wine, and all was forgiven. Sigh. What a let down. I wasn't ready to let the drama go. Plus, we still hadn't solved who ate Bre's granola bars. Nobody ever confessed. Either Nicole really was innocent of eating the bars, or she just got away with the crime of the century. I blame the lack of Kim and Lisa. We need those two crazy bitches to keep the drama fueled.
The challenge this week was for the girls to learn about London fashion (mod, prep, Bollywood, punk) and go on various go-sees dressed the part. All the girls proved they sucked at this, minus the exception of Nik. This is another week in a row that Nik knocked the challenge right out of the park. Nik has proven to be just like my puppy dog's farts...silent but deadly. She might not have a lot of personality, but Nik is gorgeous and the girl pays attention to direction. She soaked in every word that Jay and Twiggy told them about London fashion and recreated it beautiful. The girls need to watch out for her. She might take this whole thing.
I wasn't impressed by the photoshoot this week. I liked the Indian-theme, but I expected the creative direction to be more....well, creative. Frankly, I thought it was boring. Plus, I wasn't impressed at all that Nigel was part Sri-Lankan. In fact, I was confused by it. Why did he bring it up 18,000 times? Okay, we get the point, you're part Sri-Lankan. So what? Tyra is black, Jay is Hispanic, Miss J is black and apparently a woman too, and Twiggy was the first working class British model (I guess the working class only bred ugly broads before her?). The whole panel has a rich heritage, so do most of the models on the show. So why was Nigel so obsessed with getting across the point of his mixed heritage like it was the biggest breaking celebrity news since TomKat? And, (two part question), why did he do such a crappy job of executing it in a photoshoot?
But what was the one good thing about this week's photoshoot? I finally get to say the words I've longed to say -- Jayla is out! I couldn't be happier if I was rubbing hot melted butter on Jake Gyllenhaal's chest. The fact that she made it past Lisa and Kim is a travesty of reality television. I couldn't be happier that she was gone. No one deserved it more. I still can't get over that blow-up doll face she made during the Wild Boyz photoshoot. Goodbye Jayla, and gooooo Nik! Win it, girl!
SIDENOTE- The three best Top Model quotes of the week have to be:
1) "That is whack!" -Nicole (reincarnating cool lingo circa 1993 to explain to the girls her feelings about being paired with Bre for the sightseeing tour)
2) "Girl, you're short, so you gotta always wear shoes. You gotta wear shoes to bed!" -Tyra to Bre during elimination
3) "Don't ever take some pill that a girl gives you." -Miss J. to a Benadryl (un)fueled Bre















Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
12-01-2005 @ 10:49AM
kerry said...
Way to use Jayla's "blow up doll" shot. That (and Tyra's impression of that) had me cracking up when it aired.
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12-01-2005 @ 11:48AM
Tamra Scott said...
JAYLA ATE THE GRANOLA BAR
Watch Jayla's reaction the morning after the Red Bull fiasco when Bre broaches the subject with her - there's a split second of "Oh, S#!t". I TiVo'd it twice and there is definitely culpability in those huge eyes.
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12-01-2005 @ 11:57AM
sugar said...
These are stupidest girls...EVER!
They don't know what preppy is? mod? punk? They have never heard the word Bollywood?
Are any of them aware that models work in the "Fashion Industry" and perhaps should be aware of Fashion like things and Fashion like terms and phrases?
I feel like sending all of them an ABC's of Fashion book, but I am afraid they won't know "what it means."
Plus, Nik is beautiful, she is certainly the most promising. Still, even she didn't know what brand the super expensive handbag was that she purchased on her shopping spree. Does she not want contracts with designers?
Dumbass. Pretty, but dumbass.
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12-01-2005 @ 3:08PM
Emily said...
Sugar, I think you are making a large presumption that they can read!
Last season's funniest challenge was having the girls read from a teleprompter. I was so hoping they would have another round of "illiterate r us."
Nicole has the prettiest face, but appears pretty shallow. Bre is pretty, but short and Nik is gorgeous but has that mole that looks like a deer tick stuck on her right eyebrow.
I was sad to see Jayla go, not that I like her, but she was the last bitch standing. Since Bre got called on the carpet about her behavior she has lost a lot of her steam. I am thinking it will be Nik v. Nicole in the final catwalk.
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12-01-2005 @ 5:40PM
Lacy Hall said...
You know what has bothered me about this season and a lot of the other seasons? After the initial first couple of episodes, you never really see them do the catwalk again until the finale. Are they practicing it the whole way through and producers just aren't showing that? Or do they miraculously know how to walk during the final episode?
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12-01-2005 @ 7:05PM
Gloria said...
Why do the women show up for the judging dressed like slobs?
They all dress as if they got their clothes from the dirty-clothes-hamper, and they show no interest in actually doing something with their hair (several fo them look like the only time their hair is combed is when they are being prepped for a shoot!
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12-04-2005 @ 9:52AM
Suzanne said...
It was Jayla's time to go...a long time ago. The blow up doll photo was wretched.
"I don't know what Bollywood is", says Ms. Nicole. Well stop watching so many cartoons in her off time. Recommending "Bride & Prejudice" for a great laugh.
Explain, demonstrate, & give the ladies money to spend & 3 out of 4 couldn't reproduce preppy, mod, punk or Bollywood. Surprised at getting dressed in a taxi? At this point I'm surprised they can dress themselves.
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12-07-2005 @ 10:27AM
Kamara said...
This season wasn't so bad, but nobodies says it's good. I think eva will always be the be America next top model. She shines because of her life, NAIMAH DONT.I also think bre should win this season. She is the baddest of all them girls. Nick is not that pretty, and nicole needs to get beat up. Nicole did to much over her little energy drink, I think bre had the right. And who ever ate bre stuff must have been crazy, because they knew bre was going to beat them up. Any way i always thought the two girls left in the finales would be kim and bre. But, sense kim is off, we knew who's going to win. It's going t be Bre.
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12-14-2005 @ 2:40PM
EZ said...
This season was a travisty! I feel that Nicole should not have one ANTM. Nik was a far more better model and Nicole seems to immature to handle the industry. And the way she FLUBBED on that Cover Girl Commercial...Cover Girl shouldn't even WANT her as a model! I'm looking forward to seeing Bre and Nik a lot more than Nicole. Nicole is going to go into go into reality obscurity just like Yohanna from Cycle2 did. Where is she now anyway?? As for Naima, it's going to happen to her to now that her "My Life as a Cover Girl" is over. Bye, Naima! Eva is by far the best one to come off the show and we'll be seeing a lot more of her, I'm sure. Her name stays in the paper and tabloids, but there's no such thing as bad publicity.
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