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The Five: Things wrong with SNL

snlEveryone's favorite "good ol' days" topic for complaint nowadays has got to be Saturday Night Live. "It was so much better in the Gilda Radner days", "Ever since that damn Fallon pretty-boy...", "Bring back Dana Carvey!"... take your pick. I don't think I know anyone that can say that the present season (or any of the seasons in this new millennium) is the best or among the best. It's not that I really hate SNL... I just hate what's happened to it. I love this show and that's why I want to help it so badly, protectively cradling the TV in my arms whenever the show comes on. And before you flip out and say that there's no possible way to cram everything wrong with SNL into a list of five, remember it's the top five. Plenty of things are wrong with the show as of late... After all, the show was once synonymous with "comedy" and now is only synonymous with "beating a dead horse". What went wrong?

Well, here's what I think. In no particular order (because everything's equally horrible)...

Stupid theme songs:
Why does every returning character have a damn theme song now? Merv the Perv, Debbie Downer, The Couple That Should Be Divorced, and last Saturday's Carol ("I'm CAAAROL!") for example. A few years ago, these were reserved for fake talk show segments where theme songs actually made sense (like "Brian Fellows"), but now they're everywhere. I throw up a little in my mouth whenever I hear one because it's pretty much warning the audience that there's a one-joke character coming up. Merv the Perv does a bunch of really gross jokes, Debbie Downer has those trumpet noises and a joke about feline AIDS, the angry couple fights and then has crazy sex, blah blah blah. Throwing in lame theme songs just adds insult to injury.

Misuse of talent:
Okay, I really only have one complaint about this... Darrell Hammond seems like the old guy that just tags along now. He does some amazing impressions but rarely gets the chance to show it because he's always stuck with generic anchor/pundit roles. When he's not doing those impressions, he gets stuck doing tiny roles. It actually hurts me to see him in certain sketches when he pops up with maybe one or two lines and then walks off.

We get it! Now shut up!:
I'm sure Finesse Mitchell is a really funny guy, but in order for the viewers to see that, he needs to stop doing those "Haha, this white guy was about to call me Kenan 'cause we're both black" jokes. It was funny the first time but it kind of died after the fiftieth go. Fred Armisen is a pretty funny guy as well, but he has some truly horrible characters. His Fericito character was cute the first time when he popped up during Weekend Update a few years ago, but he definitely did not deserve a sketch of his own. Yeah yeah, you're just "keeding". You're always "keeding". We understand. Now get out. Although the show has always had formulaic character sketches, at least the Spartan cheerleaders had a new cheer every episode.

Terrible characters:
It started sometime before The Falconer and just snowballed from there. I can walk up to anyone in my school and ask, "If you were a hot dawg, would yeh eat yerself?" and we'd immediately break into fits of laughter. However, "Feline AIDS is the number one killer of domestic cats" doesn't bring anything but confused looks and "Man, Debbie Downer is lame" remarks. I think the only quotable recurring thing from the last five years is the "Barry Gibbs Talk Show" theme song ("Talkin' 'bout chest hair... Talkin' 'bout crazy cool medallions!"). Plus, it kind of feels like the writers have gotten stuck on characters that cannot develop any further. I guess they've forgotten the importance of occasionally having characters with depth (yes, even on a show like SNL).

Crappy Weekend Update:
I never really liked Colin. I didn't care much for Norm either. I really liked Jimmy Fallon, but that's just because I thought it was cute how he played with his messy hair whenever he got nervous (I was young. Forgive me). But I think the last great one was Kevin Nealon, because he had that dry delivery that I thought was fantastic. The segment has lost some of that false professionalism that once made it so funny. Sometimes Weekend Update just feels like a drag, time for me to take a potty break if I missed my chance during the last musical performance (admit it, you don't stay for most of the performances).

Alright, I've got my ranting out of my system. Now, it's your turn. What do you consider to be the five greatest flaws of SNL as of late?

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