TVSquad

Y'know, usually I could give a rat's ass about celebrities and their personal lives. In fact, that's almost always the case. But in writing for TV Squad, it's sort of unavoidable to read at least some of the dirt. Case in point: the recently released photos from Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore's wedding. How much do you want to bet that Bruce Willis's mug will be spotted in these somewhere?

We get it, Bruce. You're cool with the whole Demi-marrying-a-guy-who-passes-playing-a-high-school-kid thing. But why oh why are you showing up as the third wheel all the time, in public no less?! I can only assume that he's trying to prove either to himself or the world that, hey, he's cool with this lanky punk being the stepdaddy to his kids. Either that or he's A) hoping to get in on some three-way action, B) honoring his prenup that says he has to be a babysitter to his kids when mom's on a date, C) all of the above.


To top things off, Bruce goes ahead and decides it's a good idea to appear in an episode of That 70's Show. Hey, while you're at it Bruce, why don't you try directing a new movie featuring Demi in several gratuitous sex scenes? "Hey everybody, look at me! I'm cool with this! Really! Watch my ex-wife have simulated sex with other guys! Drinks are on me!"

I remember years ago when Bruce was making a big, public stink about the NC-17 rating given to the craptastic 'Color of Night' because it showed his willy. As if to say, "Hey everybody! I want to show you my naked penis in a movie, and I'm cool with it! And I want younger folks to see it, too. Really!" Same thing.

Seriously, I hope he doesn't read this, because he'd surely kick my sorry ass.